In about an hour we are going to church to celebrate the ordination of two wonderful men. Russ and his family are getting ready to start a multicultural church in downtown Jackson. Mark and his family are getting ready to head to Lisbon, Portugal to be full time missionaries. It is exciting to see how the Lord has called and prepared these two families for the next step in their work for the Kingdom. I can't wait to watch how He works through both of these new ventures.
As I watch my friends preparing for new adventures, it is a stark contrast to the disappointment I feel over another dead end on the search for our own. Two years ago we thought we had a new beginning, and it didn't happen. That was our fault. We said no. This time it wasn't our choice. We did everything in our power, and it still didn't happen. Although I am very sad, it is easier to know that we were obedient to the end. The sadness will dissipate much faster and easier than the anger and guilt I felt before.
As I write I wonder, will I have the courage to dream again? Yet, even as I ask that question, I know the answer. Because I know that the dream has never changed. So the real question is, do I trust enough to believe it will happen-not in my timing (obviously), but in the Lord's? And when the sadness rolls away, I believe that I will. Maybe the last three and a half months were just the training grounds for what waiting really means. I need to learn to do it well-and bring glory and honor to the Lord, even in the desert.
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